Sister Drama ugh

Mom and Trish are coming up Thurs. We hope to schedule the port surgery then. But if not they will help me box up all this garage sale stuff. I asked Trish to not invite Becky. I told Trish I felt Becky has been telling me how I had to "do" cancer. Praising God for it and singing...and ignoring my real feelings. I don't believe like that.  I think God understands this is scary stuff and I'm struggling.  He understood his SON in the Garden of Gethsemane. 

I know she's just coping the way she needs to deal with it. Her doctor told her he wanted to put her on tamoxifen to prevent ca. and she is refusing. She said God will protect her. Which made me feel like  ?What the heck?? what am I??..ground liver? Because He DIDN’T protect me from cancer, I’m not as spiritual?  She probably never meant it like that.  But you know what?  When you are told you have a life threatening condition, your emotions are wired.  You are sensitive and you struggle to cope.  So to help me cope, I asked that she not be invited cuz...the idea of listening to her for however long they are here....just wears me out.

And Oh heck fire!  Even as I peck this out I get a text message from Becky that they want to come Thurs. augh. Mom told her about it. I think it’s hard for mom to grasp that sometimes a couple of my sisters just wear me out. ugh

Well I will update tomorrow when I have a clue about surgery and such.

MarylandCrab:   (((person who contacted Marcia))) Yay for that!  Your job is really to take care of you during all of this.  KJ will survive, and maybe just learn to handle his own eating/food issues.  I'm glad your family is coming to help, I'm sure your mom wants to be here for you too.  And keep away the people who drain you.

Any word on whether James is moving back or not?

Margie: Praising God there is no hot spot anywhere else via PET scan. Thank you Lord!!!  Continued prayers!

Rosey: I am so mad! I got a text from Becky that she was coming with mom on Thurs.  Trish said Becky invited herself. I'm irritated about the whole thing now.  Then I get on facebook and find that Becky posted all my medical information. She asked for prayer because I finally posted I had cancer.  That was fine.  But then SHE added that it was the same cancer as moms...that I was having chemo and had to take classes and get a port later this week. Then I would start chemo.

Am I wrong for being upset? I told KJ I might have posted that information myself later. But I HAD NOT YET MADE THE DECISION! And I thought it was mine to make. I don't know why she thinks it was okay to post this, but it wasn't okay for Deb to tell everyone about mom's medical condition.  I hate this. Do I have no right to privacy or to control the release of information about my own medical condition?  

danica...or have kj do it!!!  this isn't about her~she wasn't invited to come and you don't need the drama. You don't need this making you upset!!!   I'm mad now. ugh!!!

Margie:   No way! Ugh!  I agree with D. KJ can tell her to back off.   You need to be pro-active to protect yourself from unnecessary stress. She causes stress & needs to stay away for now.

No pressure, but you do have to write a book.  :) Just kidding.

I loved the butt cheek boogie. Oh my.

I am so impressed with all the things you are doing to get ready for this. I don't even know if these things would occur to me. I think it will make everything go so much easier.

I'm sorry about the drama with your sisters. No one should post your medical info without your permission. Period.  :)  I am sorry that she is imposing her views on dealing with cancer on you. People do that with miscarriage and other grief as well, and it is never helpful.

Shelley: You continue to do what works best for you and your family, you are doing so great. You are an inspiration.  My friend made me a pink bracelet and I'm wearing it every day. It reminds me to pray. I even have specific prayers for certain beads...healing, peace, strength, wisdom for doctors, KJ and James...etc... so if you have a certain thing you want daily prayer for, let me know, and I will make a bead stand for that so I remember.

I love you and I'm proud of you.  

Rosey:   That's cool Shelley about the beads. I wish I could cancel the whole day with my family. But I know mom wants to see me before I start chemo. sigh.  I personally believe that mom wants to be here because she is not certain she will be able to come to the big surgery.   It stinks that a person can't just fight their cancer. They have to deal with the family expectations and needs as well.

Fighting Cancer is harder 

when you also have to fight your family.